Did you hear about the Spanish Inquisition web analytics tool?
It tortures the data until it says what you want it to say.

What’s the difference between Agile and the Supreme Court?
There are women on the Supreme Court.

Why is daily scrum like a shot in the backside?
Either way, you won’t be able to sit down for 15 minutes.

Why is a code release failure like the Meadowlands after a Springsteen concert?
Someone’s staying all night to clean up the mess, and it probably ain’t the Boss.

Why is are poorly drafted business requirements like a vampire movie?
The stakeholder ends up getting it in the neck.

[rimshot] I’m here all week…try the veal…don’t forget to tip your waiters and waitresses.